We’ve come a long way, haven’t we? In just a few months, we have deconstructed a self-reliant understanding of growth and built a theology of development rooted in dependence. Then, we put meat on these bones… We added our fundamental need to deal directly with repressed and troublesome areas of our hearts. We even talked about how we might invite Jesus to co-inhabit these hidden “rooms” with us and begin to work through them relationally. Now, the obvious question remains: “What room do we invite Him into first?”
This is a great question because we are all human and, therefore, complex! We haven’t pushed down just one part of our hearts, but many. We want some sense of priorities, don’t we? But let’s be careful not to pressurize this discernment process. We are not on the hook to ferret out the elusive next most important thing. Here again, we must depend on Jesus. Our task is simply to ask the question, “What next?” Life will teach us the answer.
When we ask Jesus to identify the room He wants to enter with us, He often speaks through our lives. In addition to direct answers we might receive through our times in prayer or in the Word, He could use any number of indirect ways to communicate with us. What comes up when we listen to sermons, engage in worship, or fellowship with our brothers and sisters in the church body? What’s going on at home with our wives and our children? What are they telling us? How are we doing on the job? When we go through difficult times, do we notice something? This is our part: to watch our lives and trust that God will use them to speak to us.
This way of hearing from God demands openness, right? We don’t know what he will say. Maybe we see anger leaking out in relationships and it’s time to move past our attempts to manage our outbursts and enter that room with Jesus, along with the wounds and pain behind it. Or, we realize that we are controlling and need to deal relationally with our underlying fears and insecurities. Then again, we might see passivity, anxiety, sadness, or frustration. The list goes on.
I don’t think I’m going too far out on a limb, though, to say that our biggest challenge might not be in seeing the area of our heart needing special care, but accepting it. Who wants to admit that he is an angry man? Or afraid? Small? We need courage to be in reality and let our weakness be whatever it is. And we need discernment if we recognize not only one aspect of our character begging for attention, but many.
When we feel overwhelmed and confused by so many “options,” how do we choose? I encourage you not to over-think the possibilities, but to discern your choice. Our decision process is not a cognitive exercise as much as it is a listening activity. I like the way Larry Warner put it in his book, “Discernment, God’s Will, and Living Jesus:”
“Take some time to sit with your choice, gently turning it over in your heart…to help you open to God and to the inner promptings of the Spirit.” –Page 142
Larry’s description gives us space to breathe. Discernment is—and needs to be—unrushed. Larry goes on to say that, “…time is a great friend when it comes to discerning and decision-making…”
As we wrap up this post for the week, I want to diffuse any remaining pressure you might feel over “getting it right.” I have two thoughts. First, let this helpful question roll around if you need to quiet and guide your mind as you sit with God: “What part of my character is the biggest saboteur of my quality of life and relationships?” Second, no matter what choice you make, rest in the knowledge that God will lead you where He wants you to go. He completely knows you and what you need to address, and He is well aware of any limitations you might have in trying to land in exactly the right place. Just trust Him and stay as open as you can. He won’t let you down.
Prayer Project
Please take some time to sit in a quiet place where you won’t be distracted for at least 30 minutes. Then, ask God and ask yourself the questions below. If you can, write down your answers in a notebook that you might keep for this journey we’re taking together. No right answers here—just be as honest as you can.
- God, as I open to you and to my life, what do I see? Is there a part of my character that troubles me and affects others?
- How do I feel about this area of my heart? Is it comfortable to accept? Difficult? Why, Lord?
- Am I ready to enter this room with You and live there together? If not, what holds me back? Let’s talk about this, God.
- If I don’t get a sense of where to go inside with You, am I okay with waiting and watching for a time? If I’m not alright, what concerns me?